Uncertainty

I wake up, it’s a clear day

Yet my soul is dark.

My mind caught in the past.

I know better, it’s not hard to see.

Yet my heart calls.

My feelings scream to be felt.

I fight it, it’s not giving up.

Yet my mind remembers.

My temptation awaits me to give.

Why is it so?

It was fine awhile ago.

Then, out of nowhere it’s back.

I hate it. No, no I don’t, but I should, I know I should.

Hurt is not my friend.

The past can’t be relived.

A future without you is certain.

Forget you, I tried, I really did.

But how can I?

Why should I?

Perhaps it is possible.

I hope so. Do I?

Yes, it’s always been yes.

My mind thinks back fondly.

A time that was special to me.

Perhaps not to you.

Most certainly not to you or maybe.

I’m hopeless, I don’t get it.

I never have.

Probably never will.